Webmaster: Contacting Google Is Harder Than Storming The Pentagon With A Water Pistol

Jun 19, 2014 • 8:15 am | comments (16) by twitter Google+ | Filed Under Google Search Engine Optimization

Water PistolDisclaimer: You won't learn a new search tip or news item here but you may laugh and sometimes we all need to laugh.

A Google Webmaster Help thread has a webmaster who is upset he had to match a price of a product he sells based on a competing web site selling it under cost, when that competing web site was actually not in business. He was even more upset when he tried to communicate that Google should drop the site, only to find out, getting in touch with Google isn't always the easiest thing to do.

He wrote:

It would be easier to storm the pentagon on my own with a water pistol than get a response or even speak to someone.

Well, not 100% true - if you know what paths you can take to communicate with Google.

John Mueller of Google responded:

I'm pretty sure you don't need a water pistol if you want to talk with someone at Google :). For example, if you want to talk about a specific issue that you're seeing on your (or sometimes even on other people's websites), you're welcome to join one of our webmaster office-hours hangouts that we do regularly... Since the events tend to get full, if you want to join one for sure, you're welcome to drop me a short note on Google+ and I'll invite you directly briefly before the public event starts.

So put down your water pistols people and sign up with Google+.

Forum discussion at Google Webmaster Help.

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06/19/2014 12:25 pm

I have to agree...I have been getting the run around from their Adwords team for the last month..For a company like this its pretty bad customer service. When they do reply its always cryptic with no direct actionable responses.

Ben Griffiths

06/19/2014 01:31 pm

Are you asking them Natural Search questions? Because they won't answer.


06/19/2014 02:23 pm

we need to stop google!

Durant Imboden

06/19/2014 02:46 pm

Has the site owner tried to storm the Pentagon with a water pistol? If he likes living, he'd better save his squirt gun for the Plex.

Jenny Halasz

06/19/2014 03:40 pm

I recently had a very bad experience with their AdWords team in trying to get something answered. It took 5 calls, 3 times they said they would call me back and didn't, and two months to get an answer to a simple question.


06/19/2014 03:42 pm

Bing are far better at answering questions and involves a simple email out to the team and somebody usually responds within 24 hours. For Google, a company with far more resources available, people should not have to sign-up to Google+ to get an answer, especially if it involves asking the question publicly.

Mark Warner

06/19/2014 04:04 pm

Only a matter of time before a disgruntled webmaster storms the Googleplex with a water pistol... reminiscent of 'Airheads' with Adam Sandler.


06/19/2014 04:40 pm

See Google does have support... At google we would ask you to do something as tedious as calling or emailing for help. Use our simple system...First, sign up for that service you don't want to use. Then track down a douche's personal page. Ask for an invite. Then wait for a "little to no warning" invitation that may or may not come to an overbooked "hangout". Thank you for contacting Google support.

Yo Mamma

06/19/2014 05:46 pm

G$$GLE considers its forum as its 'customer service'. LOL, really? The billion $ company relies on asinine volunteers that rely on attacking well-meaning question askers with a barrage of insults and sarcasm. Way to go G$$GLE, I will not buy AMAZON, fly Virgin, use an Android phone, or buy any product that partners with you or have any attachment to you. You are dead to me - lol

Yo Mamma

06/19/2014 05:48 pm

Its a joke durant, you know, like saying there's a bomb somewhere in a vehicle in the air up about 10,000 ft

Yo Mamma

06/19/2014 07:02 pm

duckduck has a nice search widget for websites. Much preferred over the G$$GLE one


06/19/2014 07:32 pm

Ever look at Google's Better Business Bureau rating? Google has a B rating despite the government action alerts and high number of complaints. It makes me wonder if the Better Business Bureau gives Google a B rating so they don't get penalized. Google's support is non-existent. For being the largest member of the internet community, they are the worst example of a good netizen that there is.

F1 Steve

06/19/2014 11:19 pm

There are three things Durante doesn't do. 1 get jokes! 2 criticises or allow criticising of google! 3 use 'just for men'!

Ben Guest

06/20/2014 02:09 pm

Nice Google + promotion Mr. Mueller. lol


06/22/2014 09:01 pm

Yes but don't think for a minute Duck Duck Go is a spam free utopia! http://www.sudorank.com/spamming-duck-duck-go-churn-burn-links/ Yep, just as mad as Google IMHO.


06/22/2014 09:04 pm

Exactly, I laughed so much at the guy trying to say Google give good service when you pay for it. Google give bad service if you pay, if you don't pay, if the day has a T in it, if it's sunny or raining and if Elton John brushes his teeth.

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